Extreme Age Differences In Marriage Can Lead To Infidelity

April 2004

Extreme age differences between husband and wife may lead to infidelity says author and infidelity expert, Ruth Houston, who was recently quoted in an article in the current issue of First for Women magazine. Houston’s comments were included in the sidebar of an article in the May issue of First entitled The Surprising Way Women Are Turning Back the Clock, which discusses the pros and cons of marriages and relationships in which the woman is considerably older or younger than the man.

Disparity in Sex Drives

The biggest danger says Houston, author of Is He Cheating on You? (ISBN: 0972055347, $29.95, Lifestyle Publications) is that in marriages where there is an age difference of 15 to 20 years or more, at some point, there is likely to be a disparity in the sex drives of the two people involved. This disparity could be a contributing factor to infidelity if it drives one party to seek sexual fulfillment outside the primary relationship.

Unable to Relate Due to Generation Gap

Houston points out that lifestyle differences, differences in moral values, even differences in seemingly minor things such as tastes in music, reading, or entertainment may eventually cause the couple to be unable to relate to each other because of a generation gap. If one party begins to seek out members of his or her peer group because they have more things in common with each other, it can lead to problems -- especially if that person is a member of the opposite sex.

A Higher Risk of Infidelity

While conceding some marriages and relationships between older women and younger men do succeed, Houston states that they start out with a strike against them. She warns, A woman should think long and hard before entering into a relationship with a man who is considerably younger than herself. The greater the age difference, the greater the risk of infidelity.

Precautions Women Can Take

Houston cautions women already involved in relationships with men much younger than themselves to familiarize themselves with the telltale signs of infidelity so they can take positive action at the first sign of trouble. (See Ruth Houston’s website www.IsHeCheatingOnYou.com for more information on the 21 categories of telltale signs.) Keep the lines of communication open, says Houston. If you sense a distance developing between you, or you spot possible signs of infidelity, talk things out together so you can keep your marriage on track.